A Blessing
by KayteeCUTLASS
Summary: Only chapter 1 so far. Sirius feels himself falling more and more for his godson and he really want's to make the move. When Harry moves in with him for the summer and comes to him for some advice he might just have his chance.


**Title:** A Blessing.  
**Author:** Katie Louise Garner.  
**Fandom:** Harry Potter.  
**Pairing:** Harry/Sirius.  
**Rating:** R at the minute.  
**Warnings:** Just a few sexy thoughts from Sirius. And Harry's only 16.  
**Summary:** Sirius realised he wanted Harry from the minute he saw him. Now Harry has moved in with him he's trying to make the move.  
**Disclaimer:** All JKR's charactors.  
**Notes:** Doubt I'll be carrying this on, I've lost interest in the plot. But don't worry, there'll be others. :)

****

**A Blessing. **

Intently, i watch my finger disappear between his parted pink lips after offering him the last of the cake mixture. The feeling of warm, wet suction around the tip of my finger shooting straight to my groin. He's teasing me, i can tell; smiling around my finger and gently grinding his teeth around the skin as I bring it back out. All I needed was some way of prooving my theory that he wanted me as much as i did him.

I promise though, i never meant for it to be this way. _No way_,the very opposite actually. I wanted a very quiet and happy life, the life of any other forty-two year old man, with a family and friends that were there for me until I died. My life has never been... amazing. I hated my family, the lot of them. Every single one evil and winging, who loathed anyone that wasn't one hundred percent pure blood. I got out of there as soon as I could and spent my younger years with my best friends from Hogwarts. When I escaped from prison, after being wrongly accused of _murdering_ two of my best friends, and learned that I had some remaining family, that I didn't despise, I was ecstatic. Harry Potter. I did all I could in my power to find that boy and try to, for once in my life, get my everything on track. I'd _always_ been jealous of those men with families, like James and Lily - I was so happy for them but deep down I couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy.

When I found Harry, I didn't expect him to be as he was. Where as I expected a tiny little thing who I could teach things to and take to the park on sunny days, I found a strong, tall boy with great courage and just as handsome as his father. As soon as I saw Harry I knew, then and there, that it wouldn't be as I'd expected. I'd watched him for a while before I finally spoke to him. The way he moved, the way those brown bangs hung messily over his eyes, the way he smiled and his whole face would light up. Everything about him I found perfect. And not in the way a godfather should find his godchild perfect either.

And yet, no matter how much I tried to stop it, he grew on me more and more as we got closer. He'd look at me with this hunger in his eyes when we'd been apart during school terms. He'd press himself against me too close when we hugged, whisper to me asking whether we'd one day be a proper family. When he moved in with me last summer it just got worse and worse. Yet I swore, that he too had feelings for me. It seemed as though he would try desperately to tease me, to make me jealous. He'd shower with the door open, make sure I heard him playing with himself at night. And I swear, more than once, that i heard him cry out my name.

"Nice enough?" I query Harry, watching him smack his lips. He nods enthusiastically, making his hair messier than ever and begins to lick his own fingers, savouring the sweet taste.

"Honestly though? I don't think Mrs Weasley will be too impressed compared to her cooking..." Harry grins, using his wand to clean the plates and put them back in the drawers. I smile, watching the young wizard. Sixteen, not even of age yet and already a better wizard than most. His muscles flex under the thin shirt he's wearing and I can't help but feel yet another painful throb in my boxers. Eager to get closer to him without it being suspicious, I suggest we go and watch some tv.

"So," I begin while we sit, thighs pressed together on the couch. "How was your latest term at Hogwarts? Anything interesting to tell me?"

I slip my arm casually around his shoulders and beam at him, watching his flawless complexion flush the lightest tint of scarlet as he converts his eyes towards the ground.

"Well, the usual you know. Lessons, revising for our NEWTS, spending time with Ron and Hermione. I'm getting private lessons with Dumbledore this year too, you know? They're proving to be quite fun... And I err... I met a girl..."

My heart stops. I feel like I've been kicked in the chest suddenly. A _girl_? Not a boy? Not me... Honestly, i knew this would happen. I let my mind run astray as he told me of his first kiss. I wasn't listening particularly, just nodding here and there thinking that surely I couldn't make a move like I had planned to now. He told me of the kiss in excruciating detail. My stomach felt like it was being twisted into more and more knots with each word that he said.

"But... I broke up with her. Decided she really wasn't what I wanted really."

And with that my whole body slumps back again, limp and relaxed. The heavy pounding of my heart slowing again, I take a deep sigh and close my eyes. Harry must've noticed this yet he sat pretending to stay oblivious, not letting his eyes leave the flickering screen of the tv. I gently place my hand on his thigh and laugh, with relief, although to Harry it wasn't at all supposed to seem like that.

"Did you er... just kiss her?" I ask curiously. Harry nods, finally turning to look towards me, eyes sparkling. For the first time since I first met him, he looks vulnerable and scared, a face full of questions and awe. Harry cautiously reaches down for my hand that is on his thigh and tightens his fingers so much that they start to turn white. He moves towards me, lips parted just enough for my tongue to slip through, explore his mouth. For a second I begin to think that he _is_ about to kiss me, i feel that familiar kick in my stomach, fluttering in my chest but he doesn't go anywhere near my lips only to my ear. Warm breath tingling against my earlobe he whispers;

"I want to learn Sirius..."

The fluttering in my chest that was there from before grows a lot stronger. _Surely he's not talking about the same thing we were a moment ago! No, it's something else. _I try to assure myself, not get my hopes up, but the excitement inside me has risen like a bubbling couldron overflowing and before I could stop myself...

"You want to learn about sex?"

Harry looks ashamed. He looks as though the thing he would most like to learn about right now is how to make the ground swallow him whole and never let him out again. He shuffles his feet, avoids my gaze once more and for a horrible minute I think I've blown my chance once and for all. Until he nods, very gently and timidly, but he nods. I move to kneel in front of him, taking his hands and forcing him to look at me. He's turned the shade of scarlet again and droplets of sweat trickle down his forehead. Trying my hardest not to start smiling manically, I look deep into the glistening green eyes that sit before me and tell him that I'm there for him. I tell him that I love him and that I would teach him anything he needed to know. I tell him not to be embarrassed, to tell me what he needs to know and why. I tell him that he can pour his heart out to me and I won't tell a soul because he means the world to me.

"I... I'm sixteen and I'm so scared that when it does come to the right moment that I'm... well I'm not going to have a clue what to do! I hardly know anything about sex Sirius! Hogwarts isn't like muggle schools, we don't have sex education or anything! And I am so _so_ scared..."


End file.
